Monday, October 23, 2006


My eye twitches involuntarily, but how many twitches and ticks are by design. Not sure what's causing it, but if history tells me anything, it has something to do with stress. The first time was over 20 years ago when my kid sister Margie died in a car crash. Again the imperceptible movement in the outer corner of my right eye during my excruciating divorce and again when my mom died less than a year ago. Is it still the "mom stuff " or have we moved into the realm of the "troubled teenage years".

Buster's school is less than a mile away from our house. I like to get up every morning and take him. The idea was so that he wouldn't have to walk and we could have a pleasant chat to start the day off with. My 16 year old son is making his life increasingly difficult. I almost backhanded him in the car this morning. I hate when the memory of the way my father treated me as a kid manifests that anger within my own body. I hear his voice and see the anger in his eyes. I can feel the sting of his hand and what it did to me. I was 10 buster is 16. After my folks split I didn't have to worry about punishment anymore.

I didn't hit him, but I have to say that I liked him flinching, anticipating something that didn't happen. Instead the voice of the beast came up from my belly and yelled at him at the red light just a few short blocks from the school. I don't like taking that tone with him, but when he smugly mocks me, it makes me mad. I'd be surprised if he said ten words to me all weekend.

Thursday, Polly and I went to a parents night at his school. I can't say that I was too happy to find out that he's failing ALL of his classes. To this point, at home, we had pretty much laid back and tried to give him the time and space to adjust to his new surroundings. He's been here for 2 months now and in school for 5 weeks. He can pull his shit out of the academic nose dive he's in, if he busts ass for the second half of the quarter.

There goes the eye twitch again, like a little obnoxious friend saying "Hi! Hi! Hey! I'm Here. . . It's me. . . your friendly little eye twitch"

We have tried to give him the benefit of the doubt when he says that he had completed his work or homework or assignments. Now that's not good enough. Obviously he needs a greater level of parental supervision on all things that happen at school.

Will the boy clean up his act? Will the father go on a violent rampage? What will happen next in North Hollywood? Stay tuned!

1 comment:

London said...

Had the same eye problem myself. It lasted a week and drove me fucking nuts. It is a stress thing. It was during the end of a very bad two weeks. Funny thing is that it is caused by stress but at the same time it stresses you even more because it just won't stop and it hard to ignore. Anyway just wanted to say hey and check to see how things are going for you. Things have been much better hee lately. I hope it last. Talk to you later....Oh yeah I will email you later , I have a magic related question for you.
All the best ,